From a friend of mine I've known through the years as nothing more than CJ:

[CJ] Have you ever thought about the speed of Lint?
[D] The speed of what?
[CJ] Lint.
[D] Hmm, I suppose not. What IS the speed of lint?
[CJ] Think about it. The Speed of Lint is even ghreater than that of warp speed. Theres lint in your pocket, right?
[D] Yeah..
[CJ] How did it get there?
[D] I dont know.
[CJ] See! It's THAT fast! It's the speed of lint!

-- The Letter D

There was once a small child who lived within the blocks of houses around here. Her hair curly and tirty, and she was marked with grey from head to toe. Cavorted in mud, smashed peoples gardens and tormented the cats. And yet despite growing up in a big scary world, she had the eyes of the ever innocent. Six years old and spirited as the dawn she was named after. Ten years older, I'll never forget her words of wisdom that she came up with every day.

"Lets go play!"

-- The Letter D

Well that is getting quite deep into the name calling. Perhaps a more gentle tone will prevail after the tantrum


i hate ur

ur stinkin guts
u make me vomet
the scum between ur toes

i hate u
ur stinkin guts
u make me vomet
the scum between ur toes

Dressed in YELLa
Went upSTAIRS to KISS her FELLa
Made a misTAKE and kissed a SNAKE.
HOW many DOCtors DID it TAKE?
if it's wet and not yours, don't touch it.

i'm telling my mommy on yy-yy-UUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!

You've got Cooties - blue to make it true, stamped it, black magic!
Oh, yeah?!?!?!!?

Well, back at ya', buddy!!!!!!!!!!!!

cat hat tat bat sat mat rat aat brat hgjehgkjrshjkhgkjfdhgkjfdhgkjfghjfkhggjhgk hfdgnfgkfdygj,fdhgkjfdugkjfdhgkjfdgyhjfhgkjfb bjfhgjfhgkjfdgyhfkjdghkjfdhgnfdugjhntgjktrgyhjrt
Well, you spell "weard" in a weard way, Hoistrersfda... so you can just pin a rose on your nose!!!!


thalia, the mildly-lactose-intolerant

I love my mom.I think that this is a weard sie.My name is Hoistrersfda.Everybody is weard.
No, I haven't seen Theophilus for a couple of months, at least...


Ahhh, the family is nearly all home, new faces abound and the homefires are warm and cozy...
Anybody seen Theophilus lately?

Tis the season for DanZen

Chaos Zen

There's no rule against it, is there?


oh, and I don't think the librarian wants me to do jumping jacks in the library. eh?

-nico blue

"i wouldn't be suprised if I just sneezed my brains right out."
-my inner child

-nico blue

That was just a little peak inside the mind of the elusive queen thalia.
Now do 20 jumping jacks, you've probably been sitting in front of that computer screen way too long.
Get yourself some yummy ice cream when you're done; you deserve it.
"I wouldn't be surprised if the WHOLE AIRPLANE WING just FELL RIGHT OFF!!!!!!"

(Said by the "precious" little boy who sat behind me... who had been kicking for the past 4 hours of the flight from Seattle to Denver... which usually takes about 90 minutes... during severe turbulence... and they didn't have a vegetarian meal for me to eat... grrr... at least I brought my cd player...and my Bethoven cd, with Moonlight Sonata... ahh, life is good)


"If I was a cloud, I could go anywhere.And I'd be happy all the time".

(Said by a 7 or so year old girl on the bus as she frollicked about, to the frustration of her rather haggered looking father)

Either you turn the steering wheel and see or you press the peddles and go fast. You can't do both at the same time.


"I don't know how to earn money or get married or buy houses. I'm not tall enough."

-From "Running From Safety" By Richard Bach (chapter 21)

To the person who wrote about the "Weird boys playing hopscotch".Thanks.I was, many-many moons ago, fairly similar to the type of fellow you describe.Although I was forced into playing soccer; while at school, I often enjoyed nothing more than hangin' with the 'booky' girls....talking about strange things, reading, whatever.Good times.I think those experiences have benifited me in my "adult" life greatly, esp. regarding women.Hmmm....that may have sounded a little silly, but I hope I communicated my point fairly well.
A guy who likes to play with hair, snuggle, and just talk sometimes, is not gay, he just likes girls enough to spend more time with them instead of fighting other guys
One of my cousin's kid's once asked "How come when cows eat green grass...there milk is white".

No extent of explanation would suffice.

gfhtrgf hrfgfhegh dhfgdhfg dhgfh hgfggfhgf bhgfhg hgfhg ghfgf bfhbfghfgfghghjfhgjfhghjghjhhgjjghghf
The weird boys who play hopscotch actually make the best and most interesting friends and potential mates owing to their sensitivity and lack of exposure to play-fighting and other bizarre male rituals.
1 if you ask mommy "are we there yet" more than 5 times she will get really mad.
2 don't ask mommy where babies come from because it will take her forever to tell you nothing.
3 i know God made chocolate and vanilla, but did he have to make pineapple fudge-yuck
4 "don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things." i don't know who said it but it must've been someone really smart.
5 don't start fights on a road trip where you will be in the car for more than an hour becuase everyone hates you after that.
6 even the wierd boys who play hopscotch are nice once you get to know them.

If practice makes perfect but nobody's perfect..... WHY DO WE PRACTICE!?!?!?!!?

If you don't stand 4 something you will surely fall for anything

* your mother WILL find out if you die your hair
* you cannot set off fireworks in the basement
and not get caught.
* don't EVER juggle knives unless you're really,
REALLY good at it.
* you haven't really lived until you've gotten a
48 on an Advanced Placement U.S. History test.
* milk crates make boring pets
* if it hurts, DON'T DO IT AGAIN!
* don't sprint around a pool if you're trying to
impersonate Jim from Huck Finn.
* never pierce your belly button in the dark.
* if you start to like a girl, her roommate will
immediately start liking you.
* if you're not living (i mean really living)
you're dead already.
* don't take the SAT twice if you already got a
good grade on it he first time.
* if at first you don't succeed try again. Then
give up. no sense being ridiculous about it.
* Hair is flammable. VERY flammable.
* White dogs and black pants don't mix.
* Dyeing hair strawberry blonde that is already strawberry blonde makes it turn strawberry pink.


All you need to know for life you learn in kindergarten:
~ Do on to others as you would have them do to you
~ Afternoon naps are necessary
~ Cookies and milk count as meals
~ Don't talk to strangers
~ Look both ways before crossing the street
~ Don't be afraid to ask for help, When you need it
~ Play Fair
~ And most importantly, Have Fun!!!
Things learned as a child

* No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats.
* When your mom is mad at your dad, don't let her brush
your hair.
* If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always
catch the second person.
* You can't trust dogs to watch your food.
* Reading what people write on desks can teach you a lot.
* Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.
* Never hold a dustbuster and a cat at the same time.
* School lunches stick to the wall.
* You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
* Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
* It's easier to see the mistakes on someone else's paper.
* Don't say that the "last one is a rotten egg" unless you're
absolutely sure there's a slow kid behind you.
* A pencil without an eraser may as well just be a pen.
* Sometimes the best one in the play has the fewest lines.
* Twelve is a lot older than eight.
* Sometimes your best move is blocked by your own checkers.
* If you want a kitten, start out by asking for a horse.
* Your room gets smaller as you get bigger.
* You can't start over just because you're losing the game.
* A snow day is more fun than a vacation day.
* All libraries smell the same.
* Sometimes you have to take the test before you've finished
* Silence can be an answer.
* Don't nod on the phone.
* The best place to be when you are sad is in Grandma's lap.

A bit of advice,
Falling is painfull, never fall
this includes falling in love.
I don't waste time in chats.
anyone want to chat with a 12/f?
2 days ago, I let my 6 year old son help demolish a car. Well, at least strip it down for all of the good parts. It gave him an outlet for his sometimes destructive urges (which all kids and most adults usualy have), as well as giving him a chance to work with tools and manual dexterity. He expended a large amount of energy and I don't believe he has ever had a better night's sleep. Tearing apart a car is something I recomend for all kids, so long as it's a car destined to be scrapped and the owner consents to doing so.
I definitely learned at a young age not to annoy a can.
If you annoy a cat you get scratches, but annoying a can just plain hurts!
I'm reading this and I'm e-Dan. Why don't we sign our names.
Who am I talking to?
I was putting together a Kinder toy for my niece. It was taking a long time and I looked at her and said "Sorry this is taking a long time. This is complicated."
She cocked her head to one side and spoke "Complicated. That means you have to pooh your pants. Do you have to pooh your pants?"
You should not play with cans that have been opened with a can opener either
I mean cat, not can.
Nori, age 8
Do not annoy the can, unless you want large scratches.
age 8

You sound desparate - if you are in need of help, come to the Den of Psychedelia and look for the Guru post.
Anybody here? PLEASE answer!!!
Don't play follow the leader with a blind man, unless he has his dog/cane.
I find it very diffucult to walk through walls.
If you have a cross that doubles as a gun that shoots silver bullets, and triples as something that... uh... gets rid of mummies, your pretty much safe =]
I find it very diffucult to walk through walls.
Don't play follow the leader with a blind man, unless he has his dog/cane.
Never eat anything bigger than you head.
if you get married, don't assilimate yourself
Each to their own
You should not get married at all
Hi guys, while moving the last post from laughter to kid's wisdom (with permission) we accidentally erased the bat file. Now the Denmaster's bats are all confused. Sorry, you will have to have the bats retrained to visit you by clicking on the bat at the top right.
This is how kids handle the question of MARRIAGE!

1. How Does a Person Decide Who to Marry?
"No person really decides before they grow up who they're going to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you're stuck with."
- Kirsten, age 10

"You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming."
- Allan, age 10

2. What is the proper age to Get Married?
"Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then!"
- Cam, age 10

"No age is good to get married at.... You got to be a fool to get married!"
- Freddie, age 6

3. What Do You Think Your Mom and Dad Have in Common?
"Both don't want any more kids."
- Lori, age 8

4. What Do Most People Do on a Date?
"Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough."
- Lynnette, age 8

"On the first date, they just tell each other lies, and that usually gets them interested enough to go or a second date."
- Martin, age 10

5. What would you do on your first date if it was going poorly?
"I'd run home and play dead. The next day I would call all the newspapers and make sure they wrote about me in all the dead columns."
Craig, age 9

6. When is It OK to Kiss Someone?
"When they're rich!"
- Pam, age 7

"The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn't want to mess with that."
- Curt, age 7

"The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone, then you should marry them and have kids with them.... It's the right thing to do."
- Howard, age 8

-- SD

This may not be the appropriate place but my brother just told me something that I missed when I was young that our mother taught us - playing with cornstarch in water.
"One mans' ceiling is another mans'floor!"--slop
I remember being wise when I was young. I thought it would be a good idea to tuck your shirt into your underwear so it would not come out as easily as it does when it is just in your pants. My parents thought it was a good idea too ;-)

Amanda, 4, asked her mom why they couldn't take home
the rest of the cookies they'd brought to the people
they'd visited. Her mom explained that you can't take
back gifts you've brought, people would think you were
nuts if you did that. Amanda said "But we ARE nuts!"

Kids know the truth. Pay heed when they speak. The
way the world really works, the meaning of life -
they've got it all figured out. Pass their wisdom
along here.